Tales from the Dark Farm and Other Stories

What a weekend! I want to curl up in bed and never get up again.

Prologue

Last week I worked my butt off trying to get some Varsity stuff done, D and I bought a computer and Darius spent his week working long, long hours trying to fix a mail server problem for a VERY ungrateful staff...as of the start of the weekend, the server was still not sorted and tempers were running short. After about 4 days of getting up at 5.30, my temper was pretty thin too.

Saturday

4:45am My brother calls to tell me that he and my mother had been up all night...someone had broken in and stolen some stuff (while they were there). Got stuff together and took off for my mum's place imagining all kinds of worst case scenarios.

5.10am Reach mum's house. Turns out the burglar broke in around 12:30. My mother's annoying little dog woke her up by barking but she wasn't sure if the noises she heard were my brother or not. She called out "James, is that you?" and the burglar said "Yes!" I kid you not. She locked her door and set off the alarm. The burglar took off and was lasted seen leaping over the gate with a bag and running down the road. A neighbour yelled at him "You've been stealing haven't you?" to which he replied "Yes, come and get me!".
He didn't steal much, all he got away with was some stuff I had been storing at my mum's house for safekeeping (Playstation, DVD player etc.). Bugger.

5.30am Darius jets off to work to go check on some diagnostics that he had left running overnight.

6.45am Darius returns to my mum's house and we take a walk to the fields by the river where thieves stash stuff until they get back later. Found loads of shoes, bags and other goods but nothing of ours. Sad to see the number of empty schoolbags. What is the world coming to?

7.15am Get in car and head to Durban to watch 'Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest'

9.15am Watch movie. Awesome.

12:30pm Shop around in Gateway for last minute costume supplies for the evening. Head back to Pietermaritzburg.

1:30pm Drop off brother and head for Darius' work.

2:45pm Leave Darius' work and head for home to pack stuff.

3:20pm Leave for Nottingham Road

4:15pm Get to Notties Hotel and help with setting up for Medieval Feast.

5:15pm Proceed to our home for the night which I will forever think of as "the Dark Farm". We had been warned it was a bit hippie-ish but nothing could have prepared me for the enormous animal sculptures in the backyard. Just proves my point that only really strange people live in the countryside by choice.



5:20pm Start putting on outfits, taping breasts and doing wench-ish makeup. Mocked Jude's tights (snicker). Darius spent his time flapping his red and black cloak going "Bleh! Bleh!"

6:00pm Went to Notties hotel, finished setting up and the rest of the evening is a blur. I remember rushing about with very hot jugs of wine, delivering food, being groped and generally molested. Later there was much carousing. Got to bed very late. About 2-ish I guess.

Spent rest of night shivering. Gosh, it was cold. Didn't sleep much.

Sunday

We got up at about 7am and drove back to PMB. Dropped off our stuff and went back to Darius' work. Finally, all the work paid off the server was up and running so we spent the rest of the day napping / playing with the new PC.

I'm still tired.

This sign was in the men's toilets at the feast, pinned to the wall with an 'arrow' through it. (Darius was the sheriff)